Culture Blues

Director Deathmatch: Will Gluck vs. Ben Affleck

Sometimes, it can be tough to decide how to spend your hard earned dollars at the local cinema. Multimillion dollar marketing campaigns, misleading trailers and the presence of beautiful people can make it hard to tell just what a movie is going to be like and if it’s going to be any good. I don’t have a crystal ball, figuratively speaking – technically I have multiple crystal balls, so I can’t really help you out there. But I can tell you that the most reliable way to determine if a movie will be worth your time, money and lifeforce is to look at the director. So today I’m going to help you decide between two movies opening this weekend by comparing their respective directors in a bunch of categories. Directing is a sort of vague, nebulous position, so I’ve helpfully broken it down into terms that are more easily understandable for people not familiar with film jargon, and for nitwits.

Easy A's Will Gluck vs. The Town's Ben Affleck

Acting – Both of our directors are actually renowned actors in their own right, and nothing is more crucial to a director than their understanding of the actor’s plight.

Affleck: From critically acclaimed roles in Good Will Hunting, Hollywoodland and Reindeer Games to personal favorites of mine such as Extract, Boiler Room (“act as if”) and Reindeer Games, Ben Affleck has built up a solid resume over the last 20 years. There are also a great number of massive missteps that I’m too polite to list here. If you doubt his potential though, all I can say is that you, sir, are suspect. And Reindeer Games.

Gluck: He’s actually not a renowned actor. He was just an extra in Hamlet 2 and in a couple of episodes of Working with Fred Savage. I really just wanted a reason to link to “you’re suspect.” Mission accomplished.

Point Goes To: Affleck

***

Writing – Nothing is more crucial to a director than their understanding of the screenwriting process. Both of these men have many writing credits to their names in distinctly different arenas.

loveyouloveyouloveyouloveyou

Affleck:  The story of two young, know-it-all punks who wrote Good Will Hunting entirely on bar napkins while hunting for strange and ended up bagging an Oscar is one of the great “it can happen to anyone” tales. Afterward, Affleck officially retired from writing of any kind until exactly 10 years later when he once again put pen to bar napkin and adapted Dennis Lehane’s Gone Baby Gone, which Affleck once read a review of. The script was, naturally, excellent. Affleck also penned the script for his latest crime novel adaptation, The Town.

Gluck: Will Gluck is a credited writer on every episode of The Loop and I’m pretty sure he rewrote all of Fired Up! on the spot by repeatedly asking his actors to say things that sounded raunchier.

Point Goes To: Gluck  (simple case of quality vs. quantity; The Loop went 17 episodes, Good Will Hunting doesn’t even go two movies unless you count the sequel from Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back)

***

Box Office Draw - Name recognition is huge in the movie business. In fact, it's kind of all that matters (shhh... don't tell anyone). Actors frequently sign on for nebulous reasons. Writers essentially mean nothing (Akiva Goldsman). But directors put everything into their films, and nothing is more crucial to a director than their reputation.

Affleck: The man is a household name, largely due to his involvement in some of the most well known celebrity couples, including Bennifer, Batt Damfleck, Balma Hayek, Bendra Bullfleck, and Bennifer 2: Jenjamin Bopez. There's no doubt that his name will bring people out to the theaters.

Gluck: Who? No, seriously. Will what? Never heard of him. He created The Loop? What's that? Fired Up!? Was that the Bring It On ripoff? What you have just read is the kind of thing a moron would say. Will Gluck is awesome. Unfortunately, he didn't date a bunch of starlets and Matt Damon.

Point Goes To: Affleck

How many are we?

***

Age

Affleck: 38

Gluck: 38

Point Goes To: Gluck

***

Casting – A craftsman is only as good as his actors. Nothing is more crucial to a director than his ability to choose the person best for the role, and with the tightest ass.

Affleck: The Affleck has only directed two movies. He’s chosen his brother and himself to star in them. That’s good because the Afflecks are awesome, but bad because I hate nepotism. In Jeremy Renner, Jon Hamm and Blake Lively, Affleck has shown a real willingness to ride the waves of popular sentiment. It would be a whole different story if he’d used Renner before his breakout role in The Unusuals. So far, Affleck’s casting idiosyncrasy seems to be that he always has to cast the rapper Slaine and the actor Titus Welliver. They’ve appeared in both of his directorial efforts.

Gluck: It’s worth noting that Gluck has also jumped aboard the Gossip Girl bandwagon by casting Penn Badgley. I have no idea who he is but when I saw his name I was pretty sure he was on that show. Big respect for casting Emma Stone in her first lead and for getting Thomas Haden Church and Stanley Tucci to sign on for a teen comedy. Gluck’s idiosyncrasy is casting dual three name actors Eric Christian Olsen and Philip Baker Hall. They both appeared in The Loop and Fired Up! with Olsen powering the latter and Hall powering the former. Unfortunately, neither is in Easy A and I’m afraid that may spell trouble for Gluck.

Point Goes To: Affleck

***

Your winner, by a score of 3-2, is Ben Affleck. Affleck was able to pull out the victory thanks to his slightly more well-rounded resume (the dude was in Reindeer Games), but these are clearly two filmmakers on the rise and it might behoove you to just Movie Madness these two this weekend.